So there I was, on an expedition to Amazon in search of a corn sheller...
Hmmm, yeah. One of these little guys. At some point I'll get one of the cast-iron jobbies with a crank, but the current situation is not conducive to either buying or using one.
Anyway, what else should turn up in the search but a Do Not Throw Rotten Core Corn Sheller Thicker Heavier Hammer Establish Efficient Electric Household Bucket with Fan!
And only $500! Such a deal! How have I ever managed to live without a Do Not Throw Rotten Core Corn Sheller Thicker Heavier Hammer Establish Efficient Electric Household Bucket with Fan for all these years?
There's no description given. I guess the name is supposed to be description enough. And, I suppose, it might be... according as what, exactly, it's supposed to be describing.
"With fan" might, e.g., make sense if it means there's a built-in wind machine to ensure that light fluffy detritus, instead of ending up in the bucket with the kernels, instead gets blown all over your kitchen.
(I spent a goodly chunk of time yesterday evening shelling dry beans, i.e., green beans that I hadn't harvested in time. Got about halfway through the Big Bag o' Beans before deciding that it wasn't a good thing to be attempting while the fuzzballs were awake. There don't seem to be cheap household dry-bean shellers on the market, and it's probably not worth my time to try building one at this point.)